living is a hard thing to do, but if you set your mind to it, you can escape it just enough to where you will be okay. you know it is all a joke, but you go along with it anyway for the benefit of others who don't see that. you can be distant without being absent. employ yourself in helping others to believe in what you have already let go of. no matter what is making you talk right now - alcohol, drugs, life - you are aware of it. you are exposed as you should be. you should be. be as enlightened as possible and no one could ever say a word.